You might be from New Mexico if...

• You can correctly pronounce Tesuque, Cerrillos, and Pojoaque.
• Your next door neighbor has a sweat lodge in her back yard.
• You have been told by at least one out-of-state vendor that they are going to charge you extra for "international" shipping.
• You expect to pay more if your house is made of mud.
• You can order your Big Mac with green chile.
• You buy salsa by the half-gallon.
• You are still using the paper license tag that came with your car five years ago.
• Your Christmas decorations include "a yard of sand and 200 paper bags".
• Most restaurants you go to begin with "El" or "Los".
• You hated Texans until the Californians moved in.
• The tires on your trailer roof have more tread than the ones on your car.
• You price shop for tortillas.
• You have an extra freezer just for green chile.
• You think a red light is merely a suggestion.
• You believe that using a turn signal is a sign of weakness.
• You think six tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful front lawn.
• You ran for state legislature so you can speed legally.
• You pass on the right because that's the fast-lane.
• You have read a book while driving from Albuquerque to Santa Fe.
• There is a piece of a UFO displayed in your home.
• You just got your fifth DWI and got elected to the state legislature in the same week.
• Your swamp cooler got knocked off your roof by a dust devil.
• You have been on TV more than three times telling about your alien abduction.
• You can actually hear the Taos hum.
• All your out-of-state friends and relatives visit in October.
• You think Las Vegas is a town in the northeastern part of the state.
• You iron your jeans to "dress up".
• You don't see anything wrong with drive-up window liquor sales.
• Your other vehicle is also a pick-up truck.
• Two of your cousins are in Santa Fe, one in the legislature the other in the state pen.
• You know the punch line to at least one Espanola joke.
• You have driven to an Indian Casino at 3am because you were hungry.
• You know whether you want "red or green."
• You're relieved when the pavement ends because the dirt road has fewer pot-holes.
• You see nothing odd when, in the conversations of the people in line around you at the grocery store, every other word of each sentence alternates between Spanish and English.
• You know you will run into at least 3 cousins whenever you shop at Wal-Mart, Sams, or Home Depot.
• Your favorite restaurant has a chile list instead of a wine list.
• You remember when Santa Fe was not like San Francisco.
• You don't make eye contact with other drivers because you can't tell how well armed they are just by looking.
• You have to sign a waiver to buy hot coffee at a drive-up window.
• You have used aluminum foil and duct tape to repair your air conditioner.
• You can't control your car on wet pavement.
• You wish you had invested in the orange barrel business.
• Your car is missing a fender or bumper.
• You see Gene Hackman, Val Kilmer, and Oprah at the Santa Fe Plaza and don't care.